Billy's+myth



THE BATTLE OF MAIN STREET

Achilles was walking down Main Street one day. He waved to his neighbors and looked at the houses. Then, from across the street, he eyed his evil twin; Bubba. The two exchanged glares as an argument rose up. "My street! Get lost!" exclamied Achilles. "NO! It's mine!" replied Bubba. "It's mine!" "Mine!" "Mine!" "Mine!" Suddenly, without warning, Bubba declares war. Bubba threw the first punch that hit Achilles in the gut. He reacted swiftly with a kick to Bubba's butt. Then, Bubba slapped him across the face. Followed with a slap from Achilles. The two had a slap fight that lasted minutes when Bubba pushed Achilles to the ground. "MMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" yelled Bubba as he used his animal powers to call in a herd of cattle to trample Achilles. Achilles quickly shape-shifted into a T-rex and ate all the cows. Frightend, Bubba runs away to regroup and plan an attack. Achilles does the same. When the two sides converge, Bubba has an army of cats, wolves, and sparrows. Achilles has an army of his own that includes dogs, pigeons, and tigers. Carnage unfolds as the two sides collide. Feathers rain from the heavens as fur is tossed around. in the midst of the battle, Achilles and Bubba lock eyes, they each shape-shift into turtles and fight to the death. At the same time, cars are caught in the mayhem and are tossed around like child's toys. Buildings crumble as people are tossed to Lord-knows where. With a boom, a fireball engulfs the street as fighter planes fly through the sky. The army has been called in to claim Main Street as their own. Achilles and Bubba have a momentary truce as tanks fill the streets. The dogs pee on the tanks causing short-circuits and making many explode. Hummvees and jeeps run over almost all Cats and Wolves and perish. Tigers maul and Maim the soliders as the pigeons and sparrows go on kamikaze runs into the aircraft. With the army defeated, the street is a warzone and has more fire than the sun. Then, with each weilding rubber chickens, Bubba and Achilles make their last stand. They have a dramatic fight, pushing and shoving. Slapping and bitting when the fight unexpectadly stops. A hobo wanders into the scene. The two stare in curiosity, but they each have a secret trait none of them no about. they're bith very stupid.the Hobo wanders over and offers them a pie. Before Achilles can react, Bubba grabs the pie and scarves it down. Then, he lets out a cry in agony. A porcupine has been hidden in the pie!!! Then a police car runs him over and arrests him. Achilles, scared, hops onto a horse with the hobo and runs from the law! Achilles runs and runs as dozens of cruiser fill the streets beind him. Achilles then gets and idea. he glances at the hobo with a grin. then shoves the hobo off the horse into the cops!!!! a multi-car accident occurs with only one cop still chasing him. he stands up on the horse and taughnts the officer unaware of the low bridge ahead. he smacks into it and crashes into the cop's windsheild. he wakes up in prison. But he than escapes a few days later.

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